From "The Clock of Time" by Gertrude Ruston:
"Discipline in the home was very strict, and no alcohol ever came into it. My paternal grandfather wore a blue ribbon in his buttonhole to show his temperance beliefs but, unfortunately for him, he had a large red nose (probably due to indigestion) which people thought did not quite tie in with his blue ribbon. Neither my mother nor father ever drank alcohol and my sister Amy and I were brought up as teetotallers. I can remember belonging to the Band of Hope and signing the pledge promising not to use strong drink as a beverage. (This is the medallion worn by members of the Band of Hopoe in the early 20th century):
I had my meals in the kitchen with the maid (as did Amy when she was home from school) except Sunday lunch times when, unless there were visitors, we were allowed to join the august presence.
When asking for anything at table Amy and I were obliged to speak in either French or German so that we had early knowledge of languages and, if we could not think of the correct word, or something like it, we had to sit until inspiration came or go without. Amy, being so much older and learning the languages at boarding school, managed quite well, and I used to sit hopefully waiting for her to ask for something I too wanted. when I would also pipe up, having learned from her what it was called. Perhaps it was due to this early training that Amy and I both became proficient in French and German. My father spoke several languages. Those were the days of "speak when you are spoken to" and we did not dare enter into conversation unless invited to do so.
When holidays were on Mother, Amy and I went to one of the seaside resorts for several weeks and my father went sailing, calling into the pier to see us occasionally. My mother did not like small boats, but she came with us sometimes on the large steamers which travelled to Southend, Margate or Lowestoft. I was the only one who followed P.R. and had his same love for the sea, which has remained with me through all the years. I alone went on the yacht as a special treat for a short sail."
(This is a picture of Margate in 1897 (the year mum was born) and I imagine it would have been much like this still when she was a child in the early 1900s):
Note: I can remember mum telling me about those special meals with her parents and how frustrating it was a times when she couldn't remember the correct word in either French or German for the item she wanted passed to her. She often used to laugh about it with me.
Another thing about mum and sailing. I mentioned it before in an earlier blog about when I was 15 and down at Mandurah on holiday I was asked to go for a sail but was afraid to do so. Mum said she'd go and I am sure she would have done so too. I realised it Mum thought it safe then it should be OK and it was then I found my own love of sailing.
These little glimpses into the past are fascinating.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you are enjoying them. Mum often talked about her childhood to me when I was young and then of course she wrote about it in her book.
DeleteSuch different times and ways. I can remember my mother saying that she and her brother (clean and tidy) were brought down to the drawing room each evening to see their parents for ten minutes before bed time. And how hard her mother found life after the war when household help was no longer a given...
ReplyDeleteIn our family, we were the household help, mum used to clean big houses and sometimes I went with her.
DeleteHow extremely different was life back then especially I think among those that were of some substance. Nor sure it was much different for those that were poorly off than it is today.
DeleteMy mum did have a cleaning lady and one to do the washing when we had the corner store as mum did most of the work in the shop while dad delivered the groceries to customers. I think he stopped at each house for a cuppa. He was always good with the ladies and they enjoyed his company too.
River: We were the household help too. And my mother also cleaned houses for a time - and yes, I went too.
DeleteHari OM
ReplyDeleteAnother delightful 'lens' upon another time! Thank you for sharing these Mimsie. YAM xx
Thank you for paying a visit too. You are one of my most faithful 'readers' and I must apologise for neglecting you at times. I have trouble keeping up and I put it down to age!!
DeleteIt's often good to look back and compare our times with those times isn't it? xx
...not to worry Mimsie... I have what I call my 'golden dozen' where I will always leave a comment because they have the content which deserves; I follow too many blogs to be able to respond fully to them all and some are just a once a week visit sort of thing.
DeleteIn case you missed that, you are one of the goldens!
Yes, we need history to put things into perspective a bit - though sometimes it shows what is lost also... Hugs. YAM xx
She was a very good writer, wasn't she? It's wonderful that you have this book to give you more insight into who she was. (We only "think" we know our parents.)
ReplyDeleteThat part about the blue temperance ribbon not tying in well with his big red nose cracked me up. She had a good sense of humor, too.
Thanks for sharing this. It's terrific!
Yes she spoke well and wrote well too. There were bad times as well as good ones which of course is the story of most of our lives.
DeleteI will continue with mum's story as loon as it is of interest to my friends.
I though the blue ribbon story also very good. Mum had quite a dry sense of humour as I remember it. She left this life nearly 30 years ago but I remember her as if it was yesterday.
Thanks for paying my humble blog a visit.
I've never liked the idea of sending children to eat in the kitchen with the maid, instead of at the family table apart from special occasions or Sunday. It just seems wrong to me.
ReplyDeleteThe big red nose could very well have been from rosacea, a skin condition characterised by chronic redness of the flush areas of the face, nose and cheeks usually. Not much is known about it evn these days, certainly the cause is unknown, but the triggers for a "red" episode are many and varied. I've learned which foods are my triggers and avoid most of them entirely and go easy with the others.
I'm enjoying this series of posts.
We more modern folk would find their customs very different to modern life. I think a happy medium needs to be set as I still think families that eat together are happier as long as the kids behave as kids and not try to outsmart everyone else.
DeleteI find the airconditioning they have in shops and business premises makes my cheeks glow and red wine as well which I seldom drink anyway. I did have laser treatment on my cheeks and throat to try and cut down some of the redness. Used to feel like being stung with a large elastic band but it worked.
I am so glad you are enjoying these stories of my mum and that you keep paying my blog a visit.