Today with a heavy heart I wrote exactly how I was feeling about my life in general and how disconnected I had become from nearly everyone in my life.
It did me good to put it into words and I meant all of it but somehow, perhaps being a little too soft, I deleted what I had written in case I should hurt anybody's feelings. This regardless of the fact of just how much mine may have been hurt over past months or even years in some cases.
Earlier this year I was very sad and ended up in hospital as a direct result of this sadness. This may sound somewhat nonsensical but I am sure I am right in saying this. If perhaps I had sat down then and written about how I feel it would have helped me a lot and I would not have become ill. Even tonight I don't feel all that wonderful but am sure I will get through and come out the other side of it.
Even though I have deleted what was written earlier today I still feel the same way but in order to save the feelings of others it is gone from their sight.
I still have my dear other half and he has me and for that I am very thankful and with that I must be content. I also give thanks for my computer through which I do have some contact with others, some of whom are really great people and I am thankful for that contact.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
A while back I was talking about having an MRI after bi-lateral hip replacements. What I wrote at first was correct as it is apparently about which part of the body is being viewed on the MRI that is important. If it was my head then I would apparently be OK as the lower part of me would not go into the machine. I could not have the lower part of my body go through the machine because of the metal implants. Just wanted to clear that up and say that what my physiotherapist told me was absolutely correct. She just didn't specify why, where etc.