Yesterday was the 54th birthday of my only son, a son who nearly 10 years ago chose not to have anything to do with me or this side of his family.
I found it very sad yesterday knowing where he lives and not being able to see him. He and his family live about 15 kms south of us and we spent some great times in his home prior to him making his decision to split from us. In some way it was worse knowing it was his birthday and that he was alive than if he had died way back then. At least then I could remember him with honest regret rather than very sad regret.
Please don't get me wrong....I don't wish him ill but am just trying to explain how I feel when these anniversaries come around.
I will be 80 in January and my one hope is that perhaps he will remember that and make contact but there is really nobody to remind him so I doubt very much if it will even enter his mind to do so.
I often wonder if I will ever see him, his wife or my grandchildren again before I leave this mortal coil. I can only desperately hope that I will.